I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
