I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
