Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
