is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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