omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
