HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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