Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
