I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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