I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
