They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Randomize
