Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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