Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Randomize
