just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
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Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
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That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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