just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
