I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
