No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I pour the whiskey from now on
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
