The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
as a side note pls kill me
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
