My nipple is on Facebook.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
