Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize