I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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