i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Randomize
