matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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