I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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