So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
