Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize