he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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