my sisters under your porch take her home
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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