I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
