Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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