Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I stole a fireplace last night.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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