that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
The air was thick with penises
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Randomize
