So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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