Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize