how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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