google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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