How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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