Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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