Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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