Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Acid is not a monday night drug
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
