i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
