we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize