He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
