Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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