so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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