Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
