guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
