He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
