when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
