you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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