She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
