So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize